Last night the terrifying tight fitting PVC cat suit wearing vampiresses with comedy inflatable breasts took a break from trying to get me. Instead passing the mantle to the bin-baggers.

Bin-baggers? You ask. Bin-baggers. Terrifying collective of people who stop people on the street, at home or other unlikely place then cover the head of their victim with a black bin bag which then develops a life of it’s own and takes over the host body. You can tell a binbagger through their completely black eyes and the way they talk to you in sinister reassuring tones.

Fortunately I managed to escape their world domination plans and help fight with the resistance (using posters and compact discs) from our base which was W H Smith in Church Street, Liverpool. We were also fortunate enough to have Samuel L Jackson and Bruce Willis on our side. Whether or not the binbaggers were successful in their attempts to take over the world I do not know as I was awoken by a hungry furry pawy purry thing.

Bloody cats.

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Once, long ago, I wrote frequently on Livejournal. I then moved to Blogspot, where I discovered that blogging requires an audience. So I moved back to LJ. Then over to Dreamwidth, back to LJ, up the road of self hosting with Muckybadger before giving up entirely and moving over to Wordpress. It was at that moment I decided I would spread my compostual nonsense simultaneously across the blogosphere like some rancid margarine. And so here I am. I am a badger. But then I'm not really a badger. I am a human. With badger like tendencies. I am a writer, a film producer and a social commentator. I am available for Breakfast TV shows, documentaries and chats in the pub with journalists where I am more than qualified enough to talk confidently about absolute shite and bollocks.