More Politically correct prose. I had a good flow yesterday afternoon, cut short by home time.

Further Politically correct Nursery Educational Preschool Rhymes Prose by Stegzy Gnomepants

Mr Dumpty, (possibly of Colchester)
Sat on the wall
Mr Dumpty, had a fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Were named as owners of the wall and prosecuted for negligence under the Boundaries and hedges Act 1997 and the Antisocial Behaviour Act of 2003

 

In a secluded wooded area within the parish of Dingdong
The cat was put in the well
Who put it in?
Mr Jonny Thin
Who is now in a youth offenders prison serving time for animal cruelty

 

Diminutive female child Muffet
Sat in an approved part of the park
Eating a healthily balanced milk based snack
Along came an arachnid
And Muffet carried on eating her snack unfazed as she happened to like spiders

Two children whose names have been removed to protect their identity and privacy
Went up a hill
Because there was a council imposed hosepipe ban and that was where the nearest stand pipe was
The male child was quite possibly had an epileptic episode or suffered heat exhaustion and was involved in an unfortunate accident
And the female child did too
Probably because of a genetic illness

Mary, an autistic child
Was a keen gardener
Who grew plants
Rather well

Jack is quite athletic
Jack is healthy
Jack used momentum to travel above the candle stick
Which fell over and set fire to the curtains
Jack is now doing community service for arson

A person by the name of Polly
Put the kettle on
She was supervised by an adult
And learnt how to make a hot caffeine-free organic beverage sourced from unoppressed pickers who get fair pay from the buyers
With and without milk for the lactose intolerant