Annoy

Wrong
In the butchers
Person:- Hello, I would like some meat
Butcher:- What type of meat?
Person:- I would like meat from a cow
Butcher:- What cut would you like?
Person:- I would like shin
Butcher:- How much shin would you like?
Person:- I would like 500g’s of shin
Butcher:- That will be £3.50 please

Right
In the Butchers
Person:- Hello, I would like 500g of beef shin please
Butcher:- Certainly. That will be £3.50 please.

See how simple it is? How an unnecessary conversation can be condensed into a just one statement and answer? It’s not hard really is it?

Who the fuck are you?

Two things are annoying me at the moment. One is Ascot and the other is Jenni Trent-Hughes. I’ll come to Ascot in a later post.

Jenni fucking Trent-Hughes has been a guest on BBC Breakfast talking on a variety of topics this week. From the look of her site and her fucking Wikipedia entry she is some sort of selfstyled gob on legs.

Take for example the variety of topics discussed this week on Breakfast.

Monday

Bill Turnbull – Today we are discussing childhood poverty and I’m joined today by childhood expert Jenni Trent-Hughes

Tuesday

Dermot Murnaghan – Today we are discussing the use of salt in breakfast cereals and I’m joined today by columnist Jenni Trent-Hughes

Wednesday

Sian Lloyd – The use of lego in torture centres across the globe is a concern to all and sundry. To discuss this I am joined by Jenni Trent-Hughes

Thursday

Bill Turnbull – Just who or what killed Ötzi the Iceman? A mystery still unsolved today, to help discuss this I’m joined by our resident expert on every fucking topic known to man, woman, their dog and their second cousin twice removed Jenni fucking Trent fucking Hughes

Like who the fuck is she?! This morning she was there with Bill and Sian and some hideously frightful banshee shrieking on about the socio-acceptable use of mobile phones. Speaking on our behalf. Like she was societies chosen spokesperson. Well I got news for you missis. You’re not my spokesperson!

So she sits there all smug and she has this air of superiority about her discussing things in her matter of fact way. Joking with Bill and Sian like they’re in some sinister kinky sex cult. Same time, same channel, every day. Where do they find these freakish people from? If they asked me to talk on something like quantum physics or the effect of bananas on the Finnish economy or the Socio-Economic History of the Ottepki Tribe 2863BC-238AD, all subjects I know little about, I too could spout shit for five minutes in a convincing and yet authoritative way. I’m sure, if hard pressed, the BBC could find a different person to talk authoritatively about everything and anything they know fuck all about simply by boarding a commuter train first thing in the morning or even nipping out to the local fucking corner shop. I really don’t want to see her face on my TV again. Well maybe not entirely….I’m sure JTH is knowledgeable about some things but fucking hell… enough! Please!

Course nobody outside the UK will probably find this post relevant but there you go….

Addendum: This post originally appeared on Livejournal in 2007. A comment was made proporting to be from Ms Trent-Hughes and a rebuttal made. Ms Trent-Hughes has not been seen on BBC Breakfast since. Can I have her job?

Channel 4’s Brat Camp

What a bunch of horrible little shits!

What an inspiration!

hmmmm

Brat Camp sends a bunch of arrogant, lazy, well to do, poor me’s on holiday but they dont know it to a tough camp somewhere in America. This time its a ranch run by cowboys with attitute and beards. The idea is that they get a bit of toughening up and then helped to appreciate that they can’t go through life acting like twats.

Now I can see the ethos behind it. I can grasp the reasons why 90% of the kids are the way they are. But I cant see why theres nothing like this in the UK!

Thing is I might be slightly jealous. If I was as rude, obnoxious and as naughty as any one of those kids when I was a kid I’d have felt the crack of my dads hand on my ear and sent to bed with no TV, computer, contact or whatever. Indeed if i’d even suggested that my mother should fuck off in any shape or form I wouldnt be sat here now….well I might be but I’d be using a stick to hit the keys….well maybe thats an exaggeration but I’d seriously have a cauliflower ear….Yet what do THEY get??? eh??? eh????

A FUCKING HOLIDAY TO AMERICA!!!

Twats!

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