Writer’s Block: Smoke screen

The reason why the world economy is fucked? The continued drop in tobacco purchases. Less people smoke, less tax revenue is generated.

The same applies to alcohol. Stop smoking in pubs, the knock on effect is less alcohol is bought in pubs. Then less revenue is generated. Prices increase. Less tax revenue is generated.

Smokers are the some of the last voluntary tax payers in the world and they should be encouraged to smoke. Next time you’re in a newsagents…do your bit for your country’s economy by buying your smoker friend a packet of fags. Feel good about being a non-smoker by buying fags for those that put their health and life on the line for the good of the economy. Indeed, the next time you hear someone whinging about how bad it is for their precious little Johnny, remind them of the amount of carcenogenic fumes that are pumped out by motorvehicles burning hydrocarbons every day. Remind them that little Johnny is constantly inhaling all manner of evil fug and as well as that, having his head slowly microwaved by mobile phone, wifi and bluetooth networks. Remind them that without the smoker, no tax revenue would be generated to supply academics with the funds to research solutions to this slow death by radiation. Stand up for the smoker. THEY ARE PATRIOTIC.

The alternative? Social networking taxation. People get fat sitting on their idle behinds wanking off to all and sundry about how great their last meal was or which vampeen movie has the gorkiest knuckle head in the main role. Spreading disease and wank over the internet like a virulent plague. This is unhealthy, antisocial and detrimental to productivity. No revenue is generated and yet many people take advantage of it. Answer? Tax the fuckers to high heaven. Arsebook tax, Twatter tax, MySpaccer tax. What a great way to regulate the internet without actually regulating the actual internet. Impose a computing tax or somesuch, thus making up the shortfall from the loss of tobacco and alcohol sale generated revenue.

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