Uninteresting One liners for today

10:00 Having a poo
10:30 Walking down a corridor
10:50 Tying boot laces
11:01 Picking nose
11:02 Wiping it on the wall
11:09 Having a wee
12:00 Picking chicken out of teeth with the edge of a piece of plastic
12:01 Swallowing piece of chicken
13:01 Walking down a corridor
13:05 Walking back down same corridor
13:08 Walking up stairs
13:09 @Lecturer – Can you let me in a room?
13:10 @Lecturer – No but I saw their socks
13:11 @Lecturer – Yes. A pink kettle
13:12 @Lecturer – A giant rubber penis
13:13 Walking down stairs
13:15 Walked down too many stairs
13:16 Reached floor required
15:16 OMG! I’m missing two hours of my life!
13:17 No found them again down the back of the desk
17:00 @Shopkeeper – And can I have one of those please?
17:01 @Shopkeeper – Thankyou
17:02 @Shopkeeper – No
17:03 @Customer – I wouldnt either
17:04 @Customer – Yes
17:08 How did I get here?
17:09 Where am I?
18:00 @Bus driver – Brierley please
18:01 @Bus driver – No I haven’t
18:02 @Bus driver – Yeah well your mum sucks monkey balls
18:03 @Bus driver – Ow that hurts
19:00 How did I get home?
20:00 Oh fuck off
20:01 @Wife – Pass me the salt
20:02 Chewing
20:03 Swallowing
20:04 Chewing
14:00 Arrgh I’ve fallen through a hole in time
20:05 Oh no. It was just the clock on the mantle piece has stopped.

Automatically shipped by Eddie Stobard lorry.

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