The Compostual Existentialist

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It is a well known fact that the second page missing from the bible (the first being the copyright and disclaimer bit at the front which hints at it all being a work of fiction) is the page that goes something like this:-

And yea it came to pass on the eighth day didst Yahweh look upon what he hadst created and proclaimed “Oh woe, for there are bits that do not join up right” and so Yahweh didst createth Duct tape and saw that it was good. And so the heavens rejoiced, as did the birds of the air, the beasts of the field, the fish in the sea…

I will definitely take some with me when I go camping at the weekend. I managed to reattach the bumper on the car with a good skillfully placed strip of duct tape. Closer inspection in daylight revealed that any attempt to affix a new bumper will cause rust to crumble and the car to fall apart. Meh….not my car really is it….

I will also be taking my tent and ancillary camping equipmentz which I fished out of the shed today. Mice had made nests in most of the soft things in the camping box and it seems that a family of bees have moved into the false ceiling in the shed too. The camping crockery has seen better days (mostly plastic which has dishwasher odour) and the stove might just pull through one last trip.

So with me, as well as duct tape, I shall be taking my wallet so that I can stop off at the camping shop in Caernafon and get myself

a new plate
a new mug
a new chair
a new hat
a new memory foam matress.

I can also stop off at the Testicles on the way and get meself some factor 90 zinc sunblock.

Of course that is all if I don’t end up getting tied up in duct tape and forced into a life of gimpdom tomorrow night…….

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Author: stegzy

Once, long ago, I wrote frequently on Livejournal. I then moved to Blogspot, where I discovered that blogging requires an audience. So I moved back to LJ. Then over to Dreamwidth, back to LJ, up the road of self hosting with Muckybadger before giving up entirely and moving over to Wordpress. It was at that moment I decided I would spread my compostual nonsense simultaneously across the blogosphere like some rancid margarine. And so here I am. I am a badger. But then I'm not really a badger. I am a human. With badger like tendencies. I am a writer, a film producer and a social commentator. I am available for Breakfast TV shows, documentaries and chats in the pub with journalists.

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