The Compostual Existentialist

Wordpress flavour with added crunchy bits

Foot

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My foot hurts.

On Tuesday I stupidly thought it would be a good idea to walk from Barnsley to Brierley. This thought only became reality because I had £2.30 and I needed £2.60 to get the bus. As a poor Student I was reluctant to withdraw more money from the bank because I now need to learn to live within my means.

So I set forth.

BAD MISTAKE. The journey was good to begin with. I followed the bus route until I got to a cross roads where I thought going over the hill rather than around it would be a more direct route. By the time I had reached Cundy Cross and Lundwood my feet were killing me. But I soldiered on into Cudworth and by the time I had reached my sister-in-law’s house my feet hurt really bad.

“It will pass!” I thought.

Wrong again. My left foot hurts really bad. So then I think about possible causes. Had I strained it? Had I sprained it? Had I broken the bone? Was it gout? Was it galloping knob rot? Syphilis? Beri-beri? Rickets? Then I hear my doctors voice.

“You are very young. I went on holiday and I saw ancient friezes. But you are very young. You have a goutous disposition”

So, out of boredom, I checked on the internet for a bit of healthy self-diagnosis. Indeed the ache I am experiencing does sound similar to that described by the Gout Club and it is in one of the indicator areas of the foot. I have had fair bit of meat recently and I did over indulge myself at the weekend with jimrock and others. Then I see the list of foods to avoid, which curiously features foods I have previously been told were beneficial for people with cardiac problems (oily fish, cherries, lard, red wine etc). This leaves me thinking “Well fuck it then. Wheres the belly pork?”

Today is Thursday. My foot still hurts. To distract myself my thoughts turn to going to the pub and I’m also thinking about forthcoming events such as the Wakefield Beer Festival, The Barnsley Beer festival, The wife’s birthday minibash and my fourth wedding anniversary.

Oww my foot. 😦

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Author: stegzy

Once, long ago, I wrote frequently on Livejournal. I then moved to Blogspot, where I discovered that blogging requires an audience. So I moved back to LJ. Then over to Dreamwidth, back to LJ, up the road of self hosting with Muckybadger before giving up entirely and moving over to Wordpress. It was at that moment I decided I would spread my compostual nonsense simultaneously across the blogosphere like some rancid margarine. And so here I am. I am a badger. But then I'm not really a badger. I am a human. With badger like tendencies. I am a writer, a film producer and a social commentator. I am available for Breakfast TV shows, documentaries and chats in the pub with journalists.

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