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In my life I have owned or had the use of:- Grandstand Games Unit Commodore Vic20 Commodore 64 Amiga 1200 3 or 4 Windows PCs 2 or 3 laptops and 2 Playstations During that time I’ve played all manner of games from Pong to my current addiction World of Warcraft. Recently events got me thinking…
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Those longer term readers may recall I started a project where I would listen to every album in my MP3 collection and post about it on my various blogs. They might even remember why they then stopped reading the Compostual Existentialist. Or they might have wondered what happened to the music project. Well, it’s moved.…
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Mrs Gnomepants: So we might get our lovely period bath re-enamelled rather than buy a new one. Its a lovely original cast iron bath. Ma Gnomepants: Why would you want to do that? Oh buy a new one instead. and Mother-in-law – Why have you made your own cake? You’d have been better off buying…
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There’s a monster in the bedroom You don’t want to anger It lives inside the wardrobe And dines on your coat hanger The wife she thinks I’m crazy The neighbour he just mocks I’m fairly certain the monster Occasionally eats my socks It snacks on your shirt buttons And feasts on underwear I thought this…
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Maybe it’s because I’m a Londoner child of the urban zoo or maybe it’s because I’m an impatient fucker but sometimes people that dawdle really get me wound up to the point of rudeness. It takes a lot for me to get wound up so much I actually say something. Classic example is when in…
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Here come the men to take Away the rubbish that I make The clutter I want tossed onto the heap In orange bibs they’re dressed Slung casual o’er their vest With Daventry District Council Writ ‘cross their van They make an awful racket But take home a tidy packet To spend on treats and holidays…
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I am the office goblin I live under your desk I eat up all your paper clips And I like to look grotesque I pinch and hide your stapler I break your pencil tips I move your paperwork about And snaffle bulldog clips I am he that Wipes your white board He that alters your…
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I just had an air guitar moment. It was to In Motion Pt 2 by The Gathering. Thing is I was really enjoying myself and then I thought “OMG! Someone might see” so I stopped. Thing is I didn’t think “OMG! Someone might see” because I’m sat somewhere public with millions of people passing by.…
The Compostual Existentialist 
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