• There really is nothing that is as satisfying as a really good poo.
• It amazes me that some people do not know the correct way to pass scissors.
• I am baffled by the concept of headphone discos.
• People who are in a rush should wear a sign on their head saying "I AM IN A RUSH" rather than snap at people who are just trying to do their job.
• Like wise, people who are in a bad mood should be legally obliged to state that they are in a bad mood. Anyone dealing with the person in a bad mood should be legally obliged to refuse to deal with the moody bastards until they have calmed down or be able to pass them on to a specially trained moody bastard customer service person who will take it up the arse from the moody bastards without contracting moody bastarditus themselves.
• Lately I can’t stop weeing (as in I have to go to the toilet every 30 minutes). I hope it isn’t prostate problems……..

Student How do I photocopy?
Stegzy Well you need to buy a photocopy card they come in two sizes; 80 pence and £2.
Student Can I have an 80 pence one please?
Stegzy Sure
Student How much are they?
stegzy er….80p.

Author: stegzy

Once, long ago, I wrote frequently on Livejournal. I then moved to Blogspot, where I discovered that blogging requires an audience. So I moved back to LJ. Then over to Dreamwidth, back to LJ, up the road of self hosting with Muckybadger before giving up entirely and moving over to Wordpress. It was at that moment I decided I would spread my compostual nonsense simultaneously across the blogosphere like some rancid margarine. And so here I am. I am a badger. But then I'm not really a badger. I am a human. With badger like tendencies. I am a writer, a film producer and a social commentator. I am available for Breakfast TV shows, documentaries and chats in the pub with journalists where I am more than qualified enough to talk confidently about absolute shite and bollocks. View all posts by stegzy